I’m Diane, a once-suffering, grateful compulsive overeater who was shown how to recover one day at a time. I have "not been suffering" now for 975 days and with guidance I plan to continue not suffering until HP offers something greater than recovery. I believe the only thing that surpasses life in recovery is embracing death.

So I sat down with my HP and said, "Okay, God, what message would you like me to share?" I wrote this on a piece of paper and put it in my God box. That physical action of putting that little piece of paper into a box dedicated to questions I have no answers for is my way of giving my will back and surrendering to God. It's my way of "not doing it my way." The answer I got was to share "How it Works." So, I’m like God, I don’t mean to insult you big guy, but 'How It Works’ is read at every meeting. And God’s like, no Diane, I want you to share how it works for you.
 

"How It Works" for Diane D. - from me, my Higher Power and the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous.
 
Rarely have I seen a person relapse who has put into action the Twelve Steps of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous. I chose not to change, I would not completely give myself to this solution to suffering, because I chose not to be honest with myself. I was  one of the "unfortunates." I was not at fault (until I heard the message of recovery); I seemed to have been taught that way. I was naturally incapable of grasping and accepting a manner of living which demanded that I change. My chances were less than average. I, too, suffered from grave emotional and mental disorders, but couldn’t change until I chose to get honest about myself.
 
My story discloses in a general way what I used to be like, what happened, and what I am like now. If you have decided you want what I have and are willing to change to get it—then you are ready to take certain steps. At some of these I freaked. I thought I could find an easier, softer way to not have to change me. But in 56 years I could not. With all the earnestness at my command, I urge you to pursue change from the very start. I tried to stop suffering without changing myself but continued to suffer until I stopped blaming others and looked at myself.
 
Remember that we deal with food addiction—not just cunning, baffling, and powerful but a thief who steals lives and brings suffering! Without help it was too much for me. But there is something out there that does have power—and that something is my understanding of a HP. May you find Him now! Being just a little bit willing to change got me nowhere. I stood at the turning point. I asked for the willingness to change myself completely.
 
Here are the steps I took, which helped me to stop suffering and are suggested as a program of recovery:

1. I admitted I was powerless over food—and that my life was unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than me could help me stop suffering.
3. Made a choice to turn my will over to the care of God as I understand Him.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of myself.
5. Admitted to God, to myself, and to another person the exact nature of my wrongs.
6. Became entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
7. Humbly asked Him to remove my defects that keep me suffering.
8. Made a list of all persons I hurt, and became willing to make amends to them all.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or someone else, not me.
10. Continued to look at myself daily and, where I was wrong, I promptly admitted it.
11. Asked God daily through prayer and meditation to show me what to do and how to do it.
12. Having changed spiritually as a result of working these steps, I tried to share with others how I managed to change and to keep working these steps in all areas of life.

 
Initially I thought, “This sounds a lot like work, how am I going to do it?” 

Do not be discouraged. My understanding is that there is no way to work these steps perfectly. I am not perfect. The point is that I am willing to grow and change emotionally, physically and spiritually. The principles of these steps are guides to changing yourself and to stop suffering. We claim to get better spiritually rather than to get perfect spiritually.
 
The description of a compulsive overeater, the chapter to the agnostic and other’s personal stories made clear three things that helped me to change:

1. That I am a compulsive overeater and I cannot manage my own life.
2. That there is no single person, including myself, that could have helped me stop eating compulsively.
3. But that a God that I understood and trusted could and would if I asked him.

 
The message my Higher Power seems to want me to pass on here is a message of suffering and change. Any time I see the word recover it means "to change" and trust me, I didn’t come into the rooms because I wanted to change for the worse. I may be wrong, but I believe we all come into these rooms wanting to change something. I certainly did. I wanted to change those things that were causing me to suffer. When I came in the biggest thing causing me to suffer was other people. Or that’s the lie that I told myself. I was God-smacked when I realized that to recover or to change meant that I had to change myself. Yes I know that 99.99% of the human race has to change in order for the world to be restored to sanity but that’s not my job. If you are in the business of changing others, these particular steps will not work for you. And to change some people, I don’t think only twelve steps is enough.  I have tried all my life to change the past, to change others and even to change the future. And all I managed to do was go financially, spiritually, and physically bankrupt (400 pounds, homeless and suicidal).
 
So let me break down How It Works according to Diane by looking at the first paragraph (Big Book, page 58):

Yes, this program is most certainly a simple program. If you can color within the lines then you can work this program.

Now to "cannot or will not." Cannot for me means that someone or something is stopping me from changing and will not means I am making a choice not to change. For me, the word "cannot" should be removed from this book, because the only thing in this world that could stop me from changing myself is myself. When I chose not to change it was not because I couldn’t, it was because I wouldn’t.
 
What does this mean to get honest with yourself? Well I came here lying to myself: "I can’t help it...it’s my genetics...I don’t know how...it’s my spouse's fault because they cook it...my parents' fault because that’s how they taught me to eat...or because my childhood was a mess." And those were the softer lies. Yes, things occurred in my life that might have stopped me from changing, but the bare bones honesty of it all is that I used those things as an excuse for 56 years. I blamed a bunch of spiritually sick, abusive and addictive persons for all of my choices in life.

The truth hit me one day:  I WAS THE PERSON MAKING THESE CHOICES. And I am going to hit you with something now that may shock some, and may bother others, but so are you. We are making the choices that are keeping us suffering. A fellow of mine told me once that she fell again and I explained to her that to fall is an accident that can’t be helped, but to fall into the food is a choice and choices are not usually accidents.
 
As soon as we realize we can make our own choices, we no longer have to suffer. We can stop blaming our choices on others or on circumstances. I grew up in a severely addictive, abusive environment and, as a product of that environment, making choices was not my strong suit (I chose to steal, lie, do drugs, and eat compulsively). Not my fault, right? Wrong! The day I became a person with rights and the day I walked away from any enabling environments, I had choices, and it was no longer a matter of "cannot" but a matter of "will not." I made my own choices. I chose to be a drug addict (self-seeking), I chose to lie and steal (dishonest) I chose to hide behind 398 pounds of fat (fear), I chose whatever I wanted (self-centered). I made my own choices. I may not have chosen to begin suffering but it’s me who chooses to continue suffering. I have not suffered one hour of my 975 days in recovery. Ok, I did have a callous on my foot that caused immense suffering but I had it removed. But just to show you how our own choices cause our own suffering, I had that callous five years before I chose to see a doctor. No different than making a choice to overeat.
 
I was one of those people who developed grave emotional and mental disorders. I drifted in and out of jails and psych hospitals. In 2009 I collapsed mentally and emotionally. What happened to me mentally was equivalent to suffering a severe stroke. I had a great career as a systems analyst, a big house in the ravine, a spouse and a couple kids; I was living the Canadian dream. Then I crashed and landed in a psych hospital for six years. I revolved from the psych ward to a group home for mentally-ill outpatients — three months in the hospital, two months out, four months in three months out, for six or seven years. I didn’t know who I was, where I was or why. My family came to see me and I sent them away because I didn’t know them. I was given four years of electric shock therapy, when the suggested maximum was one year. They couldn’t get me to respond. They could not bring me back to a "normal way of living." And in the fall of my fifth year of being institutionalized, the doctors applied for a court order to certify me as mentally incapable of ever taking care of myself.
 
And now I’m going to tell you why I don’t just believe in a Higher Power—I know there is a Higher Power at work in my life today and that there has been every day I have been alive. Right before the court date, I woke up one morning after shock treatment hooked up to breathing thingy and they said I had stopped breathing during the treatment. I don’t know why, and I probably will never know why, but it was like I woke up from a six year coma. I removed the breathing thing and demanded a discharge. Apparently I convinced them I was not mentally incompetent, and I told the doctor who discharged me that I would not be back. That was eight years ago, and I have never been back. That outcome was not by my power but by a greater power.  
 
That was what it used to be like; now I will tell you what happened and what it’s like now. What happened was sometime in February of 2020, I reached 400 pounds. I couldn’t walk up the stairs without help, I fell daily because I couldn’t balance my own weight, I had sores all over my body because my fat pockets kept rubbing against each other and getting infected, I couldn’t fit in my car and didn’t drive for two years, I became isolated and couldn’t even clean myself properly because I couldn’t lift my own weight and because after a while I got used to the urine smell. On February 11th, I fell one last time, in the bathtub. Because I couldn’t lift my weight, I endured the most embarrassing but humbling experience when the firemen and police had to wrench-pull me out of the tub and drag me across the floor on a tarp so I could pull myself up onto the couch to reclaim my dignity. That was the day I made a choice to change, which was a choice to recover! It took me a few days to de-junk the cupboards and fridge and on February 14, 2020 (Valentine's Day — the universal day of love) I started loving myself again and came back to Overeaters Anonymous.
 
And what did I change? I changed every single choice I was making that was keeping me suffering. I’ll tell you of a few ways that I suffered, maybe you can relate:
 
I suffered every time I fell because I weighed 400 pounds, so I made a choice to drop some of those pounds to stop falling and suffering. I chose to do this by abstaining from anything and everything that contained flour and sugar (including artificial sweeteners because they remind me that I love sugar). I had never made these choices before, so yes I was willing to change. I have not fallen since. And if you’re here and you only weigh 200 pounds and thinking this doesn’t apply to you...remember I was 200 pounds once.
 
I suffered in my relationships because I chose to lie or control or blame or say hurtful things or...I could go on and on. So I made a choice to get honest, not just about today’s choices but also about choices I had made in the past. If I knew I had made a choice to hurt someone then I chose to deliver honesty as an amends.
 
I also suffered because I lived in fear of the "what if." What if people are talking about me or what if this or what if that. I lived in my head, and the hardest road we travel in life is the one in our head. 
 
How did I change? I chose to work the twelve suggested steps from the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, which are transferrable for my drug of choice, which was food at that time, usually in the form of flour and sugar.  
 
So...what are these steps and how did they help me change?
 
The Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, adapted for my addiction to food, and how they helped me change myself and stop suffering:

Step 1.  I admitted I was powerless over food — and that my life was unmanageable.

Food addiction had power over me and my choices caused me to suffer.  I ate, I cried, I hated, I fell, I suffered, and my life was unmanageable I binged, I stole, I used other drugs of choice (gambling), I couldn’t sleep, I lied and I lived in misery. That night after the fall in the tub I surrendered. I admitted and accepted that I was powerless. Powerless means that we are without choice.
 
Example: Stopped for a train and already late for work…I am powerless, I am without any choice but to accept that I am powerless over that train. But who made the choice to leave late for work? I did. So I must accept that my choices are the cause of my suffering. But my disease says I had no control over that train. No, but I had control over the choices I made leading up to that train. Normally I wouldn't have cared when the train came, but I left late and my choice created my suffering. No different than the foods I choose to eat. My choice to binge on food created my suffering.

Step 2. Came to believe that a Power greater than me could help me stop suffering.

If I am powerless and without choice, then who or what does have power (power means I have a choice)? Well that part is up to me. Since I have accepted that I am without power over that train, then I also accept the outcome and I also accept that something bigger than me will move that train in time — not my time. Now who hasn't been in the train situation and found themselves asking "Higher Power, if you move that train now, I promise I will never leave late again." If this is you, then you already believe in something greater, so give it a name. As to “help me to stop suffering,” the only way anyone or anything can help me stop suffering is if I do what it says. How the heck do I know when my Higher Power tells me what to do? Well...I listen.
 
Another example: Here’s a surprise…we always get a cue or an answer from anyone or anything when we listen for it. Again, not in our time. So every time I eat pizza, I suffer (I get acid reflux, I gain weight, I fall). But every time I eat pizza I hear two voices in my head. One says if you eat that you'll get sick (HIGHER POWER). The other voice says if I eat this I won’t be sick for long (DISEASE). So now HIGHER POWER has given me guidance and my disease has given me guidance. I can choose to suffer and eat the pizza (take my will back) or eat healthy and do what HIGHER POWER suggested (trust my HIGHER POWER).

There’s that choice. Did I choose to eat the pizza (my own will) or did I choose to give up that will over to the power I am choosing to trust. Listen to the voices — one is your disease and one is a power greater than you.

Step 3. Made a choice to turn my will over to the care of HIGHER POWER as I understand Him.

The Third Step comes with a prayer, as well, and that prayer helps you complete step three.  You will need to say this prayer every time you are faced with the choice to eat the pizza or not. Trust me, you will see many different forms of "pizza" challenging you throughout a day.
 
"HIGHER POWER, I offer myself to Thee to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt (HIGHER POWER I am choosing to do your will so that I won’t suffer). Relieve me of the bondage of self (Help me get outta my own head), that I may better do Thy will (so that I do what you suggest and not what I want). Take away my difficulties (help me stop suffering), that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy love and Thy way of life (so that others can see that there is a power greater than them)."

Step 4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of myself.

Step 5. Admitted to God, to myself, and to another person the exact nature of my wrongs.
​
Step 6. Became entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

Steps 4, 5 and 6 consist of three things I had to do to stop suffering:

1. Inventory - a moral inventory for me was asking…am I the best possible version of myself? If not, why? The "why" is the list of character defects I have participated in (judging, self-pity, blaming others, looking down on others, lying, stealing).
2. Confession - we are only as sick as our secrets, so we must reveal those secrets to God and someone else (sponsor?) if we are to stop suffering (lying awake at night worrying and guilting and fretting).
3. Readiness - You are ready to choose to change (recover from suffering). I became willing (to change)

 
Step 7. Humbly asked Him to remove the defects that keep me suffering.

This step is about humility. We are not, and have never been, able to remove our shortcomings by ourself, no matter how high our willpower or determination. We need our Higher Power to do this for us. In that case we have to be humble and know that these are our own flaws. I use the 7th Step prayer to appeal to my Higher Power for help with removing character defects.
 
“I am now willing that you should have all of me, good and bad (I will live my life how you want and I will let go of my past). I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows (remove all my defects — liar, cheater, thief — that is not me anymore). Grant me strength, as I go out from here, to do your bidding.  Amen. (Help me do your will.)"

Step 8. Made a list of all persons I hurt, and became willing to make amends to them all.

Step 9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or someone else, not me.

Next I made a list of everyone I hurt (people I judged, lied to, looked down on, etc.) and I planned how to make an amends to each of them (written? telephone? make restitution?).

For step 9 I actually made those amends. I didn’t just share with my sponsor; I approached everyone I hurt and made an amends. This may have been the most challenging, but most rewarding, step for me. I was scared of what would happen — would I lose them, would they hurt me, would they forgive me? Don’t let fear keep you from completing this step, because it can and it will.

Step 10. Continued to look at myself daily and, where I was wrong, I promptly admitted it.

Step 10 is my daily routine (sometimes hourly depending on how many times I was an ass) of combining step 8 and step 9. Detail how you hurt someone and make an amends right away if needed. The purpose of step 10 is to keep cleaning up after yourself. If you make a mess you clean it up. If you don’t do it right away, it will pile up until you sweep it under the rug (relapse) or put it in the garbage bin for good (step 10).

Step 11. Asked God daily through prayer and meditation to show me what to do and how to do it.

Step 11 was more simple. I had to ask my Higher Power for help to keep doing his/her will and to stop practicing my own will. To do this I asked for help and then listened for the answer. We do this by first asking for what we want help with (praying) and then listening for your HIGHER POWER'S answer (meditating). To do this I need a routine, so out comes the God box. If I have a question I pray, write it on a slip of paper, put it in the box and meditate (listen) for the answer, which for me always comes when I look for it.

Step 12. Having changed emotionally, physically (180 pound loss) and spiritually as a result of working these steps, I tried to share with others how I managed to change and to keep working these steps in all areas of life.

For me the spiritual change happened somewhere in between steps 8 and 9. No, I didn’t get hit by lightning, but I felt free and no longer suffered. The promises on page 83 of the Big Book began to come true for me. I started waking up serene and just plain happy with life. The last step is for me to tell anyone who suffers from this addiction the solution the Big Book offers and how that solution helped me change.
 
Sound like a lot of work? It is! But as a recovering compulsive overeater (I say recovering, not recovered, because I believe I have a lot of changing to do on a daily basis so I chose to continue to recover), I promise if you work these steps your suffering will end. Just because we are in these rooms carrying the message doesn’t mean we are not suffering. Some of us haven’t made the choice to change who we are or to end our suffering.

With that I wish you all another 24 hours.

Diane D. - Region One

I have great abstinence, a wonderful new attitude, so much in my life is so much better--so why should I care about Intergroup or doing service other than sponsoring?
 
Well, let’s think for a minute about how Twelve Step programs first started.  It didn’t start when Bill W. got sober--it started when Bill reached out to Dr. Bob.
 
Our Twelfth Step and several of our Traditions are all about spreading the word of recovery from compulsive eating to other people.  Our intergroups and service bodies are all about us being able to do together what we can’t do alone.  We come together and have meetings because many of us together can spread the message of recovery.  Service bodies (that includes intergroups) come together and together we are able to fund a phone line, host a website, put on recovery events to attract others and strengthen our own recovery.  But we need those willing service workers to do the service which then strengthens their own recovery.  We have a miraculous recovery to share.  To keep that recovery we must give away what we have been given and that means service. 
 
My service doesn’t need to be the same as anyone else’s, and it doesn’t need to be something I dislike--in fact it works even better if it is something I do really like.  But often times it may be something I have never done before that is out of my comfort level.

I have often found that people are really hesitant to do something that they have never done before or something that they need to spend some time learning how to do.  But what a wonderful opportunity!  I once spent several months sitting with a willing person to teach her how to put a newsletter together.  The first month I did most of the work and showed her how to do it; the final month I brought a book and sat with her while she did the whole thing.  She was afraid, but I was sure she could do it. She went on to do the newsletter for several years and it was great.  OA is a great place to learn to do things because OA'ers can be gentle and supportive.  But they can also be critical and unsupportive.  Let’s all try to be gentle with our Trusted Servants and support them whenever we can.
 
I urge you to look around and see what needs to be done for your group, your intergroup, your region, or for World Service.  I am not planning to run again to be Trustee, but you may want to consider putting your name forward as a Trustee Nominee this fall at the Region One Assembly, if you qualify. 

It would be wonderful if your local intergroup and Region One had more than one candidate for each position.  Don’t run against someone else--run with them!   

Margie G. - Region One

​As I sit here pondering what my experience, strength and hope looks like today it occurs to me that my recovery has come in increments. If I look at just today or yesterday it might not seem like much to my mind – a mind that miraculously has so much more room to ponder and to reflect than ever before. Because before I walked into OA I only had time to worry, dread and avoid the past, present and future - by binge eating, watching tv, and making commitments I couldn’t keep. I was stuck in that same cycle day in and day out due the shame and guilt of not being able to show up for life the way I thought I saw other people doing it – with ease and joy. How did they do it?

What I’ve learned is that I am a sugar addict - my drug is sugar. I have a physical allergy and a mental obsession that no amount of willpower can remedy. If I could have, I would have – I’ve heard and said that many times over the years. Oh! But what I would have missed out on….

My experience with God has evolved steadily over the years, but often in fits and starts, bits and pieces, sometimes with great joy and other times half-heartedly – wondering if I’m on the right path. I’ve come to learn I’m a seeker; and with that comes the ups and downs of letting go of old thoughts and ideas and trying on new ones. My concept of God has evolved and continues to evolve from an entity outside of me to that still, small voice I’ve come to know is my intuition. My intuition was always something I thought I couldn’t or shouldn’t trust. Hadn’t it always told me food was the answer?

What I’ve learned is that I wasn’t hearing that still, small voice but the part of my brain that only knew how to handle life with sugar and bingeing. It was always so loud! How could hear anything else? I’d never learned how to listen.

When I started working the steps in the Big Book with a sponsor I describe it as learning how to grow up and become an adult – an adult I could rely on. I learned how to show up, tell the truth and not step all over people to get what I needed. I learned how to ask for help and be of service. All I wanted when I showed up was to be thin and have you like me. I had no idea how little I was asking. The gift of growing up has been miraculous.  Little by slowly I’m being guided by God, our steps, traditions and principles and the recovery I see every day in our fellowship.

Recovery has been of the educational variety for me – I consider myself a seeker of spiritual growth. The deeper my connection with my HP – the more easeful and relaxed my recovery becomes every day.  

Erin F. - Region One

I arrived at Overeaters Anonymous (for which I am eternally grateful) 37 years ago in a crisis of compulsive overeating, weight gain, and compulsive bulimic behaviors. After six years, I became cleanly abstinent and have been abstinent, one day at a time, since. 

Along with issues of abusing myself with food, I came into OA with my glass half-empty, feeling victimized, and resentful about everything.  I am grateful for people at the meetings who had to deal with a newcomer full of deficits, and loved me anyway. I now have a 30 year journey behind me of working the OA 12 Step program, and the OA 12 Step program, working for me.

I started hearing a lot about gratitude in the OA rooms. At that time though, my complaint was “What do I have to be grateful for?” and I’d give a long list of how I was victimized in my life.  I didn’t want to hear anyone else’s gratitude either. Instead of being happy for them, I was jealous. Needless to say, I wasn’t a very happy camper when I arrived at OA. 

I am not that way now. I see now how I have a great life, even at times “beyond my wildest dreams.”  It has taken a 37-year journey in OA to get to the life of gratitude I live now. Early on in program, I did need to recognize the abuse I had suffered as a child and seek healing in other 12 Step groups and therapy, reading self-help books.  This process is not for wimps—I’ve found that it’s a gutsy and courageous and intense life choice to change and recover.  I became willing only after trying all easier, softer ways. 

This is a pitch for gratitude. Mine rolls out easily now. I’m noticing more that it seems to be the top assignment in sponsor-sponsee check-ins to make a daily gratitude list.  Whether gratitude comes easily, or after a long journey as in my case, I count gratitude as a promise of working the OA program. 

Carrie A. - Region One​

“Practical experience shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics.  It works when other activities fail.” So begins Chapter 7 “Working with Others” in the Alcoholics Anonymous Big Book, p. 89. 

In 2015, I was recuperating at home from major surgery and could not go to the Portland OA meetings I usually attended.  My OA meetings, then, transitioned to phone meetings.  I heard a speaker talk about her recovery through applying the instructions found in the Big Book.   I called the speaker and asked her to guide and sponsor me through the Big Book.   Why not try it?  Nothing else was working for me.  She agreed.  One of the most important principles she continuously impressed upon me was service.

At first, service was just to keep me from compulsive overeating.  In working all of the Steps, my sponsor told me what Dr. Bob wrote on his prescription pad:  "trust God, clean house, help others."  A six-word synopsis of what I needed to do to become happy, joyous and free.

I started reaching out to newcomers I heard share at phone meetings.  I started to sponsor according to the Big Book instructions.  And I offered myself for outreach calls to any member who wanted to chat.

But sometimes there are no new sponsees or outreach calls.  Or if I make a call and ask “how are you?” the other party may be just fine and really doesn’t need any help from me.

So I had to expand my definition of “service.”  It wasn’t just for OA members.  It had to expand to every single person that showed up in my life: sponsees and outreach callers, for sure.  But I added friends, family, strangers, drivers, cashiers, waiters and waitresses---in other words, everyone to whom I could add an instant of joy.   My job was to be of service to absolutely everyone.

Here’s the miracle of that:  while I first started to do service to insure my abstinence, now (six years later), I actually WANT to do service for others. I WANT to make their lives a little cheerier by a kind word or gesture.  I WANT to brighten someone else’s day.  And the by-product of my desire is a fairly easy, smooth, and effective abstinence and food plan, not to mention healed relationships, peace of mind, weight loss, building of self-esteem, etc.

A couple of years ago I added something to serving others.  In 2017, I started leaving small gifts, such as Dollar Tree pencils with a reindeer motif, with tips at restaurants.  I gave them to the cashiers at McDonald’s, gas station attendants, my pharmacist, the receptionist at my dentist’s office.  Anyone doing service for others would get a little treat from me. And I soon added an inexpensive something to every other holiday during the year.  I just wanted to give that other person a smile:  a heart-shaped candy at Valentine’s Day, fun stickers for Independence Day or Thanksgiving.    

You’d think I gave these random people gold nuggets.  They smile, they say “thank you,” some say “you’ve made my day.”  Even the grumpiest lighten up a bit.  But I don’t do any of this to get a “thank you.”   NONE of this simple giving has anything to do with me.  But it sure has everything to do with my abstinence, my self-esteem, and my relationship with my Higher Power.

And that’s the gift I give myself.  It works when other activities fail.

Happy Holidays, my fellows.  And happiness throughout the coming year!

Anonymous
Guest Blogger

Thank you for my recovery. I owe my life to you, the twelve-step program of Overeaters Anonymous, and my Higher Power.

I thank my Higher Power every day for this amazing life that has unfolded before me. I thank the program by working the steps, practicing these principles in all of my affairs and stepping up for service whenever I hear the soft whisper of my Higher Power.

It first started as my heart pounding during a meeting, which my sponsor said was HP prompting me to share. Then no one was willing to take the key for the meeting that I desperately needed. (Remember when we all met in person?) That was HP creating the willingness to do a little bit more. Thank you for being the kind and loving sponsor that my HP knew I needed to work the Steps.
 
HP spoke through a newcomer who saw something in me that she wanted, so I started to sponsor. I was slowly led to take on more and more responsibility with each new service opportunity. HP used all of you to show me that I am someone who is trustworthy and to challenge me to grow.
 
Thank you for showing up. Thank you for greeting me at the door as if I was a dear friend and asking me my name. Thank you for asking me to read the promises from the Big Book, a reading that I had never heard before that touched my heart as if it was written just for me. Thank you for asking me to make coffee and heat the water for tea.

Thank you for taking the time to tell me to be gentle with myself after I shared about a disappointing misstep. Thank you for calling me when I stopped showing up to my regular meeting. Thank you for asking me to speak at your meeting. Thank you for asking me to be your sponsor. Thank you for asking me to represent our meeting at Intergroup. Thank you for attending Intergroup! And Region One Assembly. And WSBC.
 
Thank you – all of you – for loving me until I could love myself; for believing in my abilities when I thought I had none. For sticking with me when I was sure my way was the path I needed to be on. I would not be alive today if you had not been in my life.

​When you chose to attend the meeting instead of isolating, you helped me. When you made that outreach call, you helped me. When you planned that OA event, you furthered my recovery. When you shared your heart and your truth, you helped me open my heart and speak my truth. When you showed me your imperfections, you gave me the courage to share mine and know that I am still loved.
 
I have no doubt whatsoever that OA saved my life. This fellowship. Each and every one of you, regardless of where you are in your own recovery journey, have the power to save a life. Thank you for saving mine.
 
Alice W. - Region One

This workshop was part of our 2020 OA Region One Convention on Zoom and included two speakers, a writing prompt with writing for ten minutes, sharing in small group breakout rooms, and sharing as a large group at the end of the workshop. For each question, participants were asked to put their “one thing” in the chat.  Here (with only minimal editing) are their responses to our three "Just One Thing" questions.
 

One thing I have done to bolster my recovery in 2020:

• Willingness to use Zoom
• Attended lots of different meetings across the country as we are able to attend meeting virtually.
• Went to an OA Rise meeting.
• honestly saying "I don't know" and being teachable
• I started a virtual meeting
• agreed to be a temporary sponsor, which opened a lot of doors
• "Balance" (more of it in life)
• studied the principle of the traditions once a month
• Doing Step 10 from Big Book - spot checking throughout the day, not just at night, I became aware of the sixth sense and intuition. This is the voice of HP.
• I make a choice everyday which road I am choosing to take 1/ the path to recovery abstinence living joyous and free or 2/ control, overeating, despair and suffering
• Setting Boundaries
• Getting a sponsor
• Attended Zoom meetings out of state.
• Making 3 or more outreach calls every day.
• Hosting virtual workshops
• began sponsoring
• Working the first 3 steps with sponsees.
• Learn to surrender to my Higher Power.
• More exercise. Discovering an online gym.
• Working with a sponsor to keep accountable so that I keep moving forward with my Ninth Step work
• Joined the Step 10/11 train which is a group of women who get paired up for two weeks and call each other with their inventories.
• Also to join Step 10/11 train, you can email 1011steptrain@gmail.com. There is an orientation meeting you'll need to attend first.
• listened to my instinct in asking for a particular person to be my sponsor.
• realizing I am a food addict and that changed everything
• Made a decision to live (a healthy life) rather than continue to compulsively overeat.
• Coming to this Convention.
• getting "back to basics" with my program...asking what wirjs? and doing that
• Acting on any small willingness that came to me
• Meditation walk daily
• Lots of shares about steps 10, 11 and 12
• Attend or facilitate a 12 Step workshop from the green workshop guide
• More service
• Started a Step Study using the 12 Step Study and Workshop
• Facilitated a Virtual Step Study using the 12 Step Workshop and Study guide of OA (Green spiral)
• Sponsoring a newcomer very different from me with food and HP issues
• Even with COVID, I can still attend my Yuma meeting and see my Yuma OA’ers even if I am not going this year.
• I took on new service position
• Worked the steps with my first ever step sister from 20+ years ago and together we used the green workshop book. It was amazing. I also started using a meditation app twice daily.
• 3 meals 1 day at a time with nothing but life in between. My choice is to be in recovery.
• acceptance of necessity of shutting down, vs winter travel to warm places, of needing to scale back on risky activities (mountain climbing, skydiving) that also help with weight maintenance, willingness to give up diagnosed food allergens, break with family of origin. Willingness, acceptance, surrender, life on life's terms... etc...

  
Just one thing I would say to a newcomer that might be helpful to them, OR one thing that really helped ME as a newcomer:

• wanna temporary sponsor?
• don't do this alone
• Welcome Home
• Go to as many meetings as possible.
• go to a Virtual newcomer meeting
• find a 12 day sponsor
• slow down and KISS! (Keep it Simple, Sweetie!)
• You're not alone, here's my number, keep coming back.
• This is an addiction and needs to be treated seriously.
• grab a sponsor guide
• Try at least 6 meetings
• listen for your story in others shares
• There is no one right way to do the program. Keep coming back until you find what works for you.
• it works if you work it
• ask for a glossary for all the acronyms
• Don't give up because the program doesn't make sense at first...keep going to meetings, get a sponsor who can guide you through it.
• Put yourself in the middle of the herd so that you create connections and break the isolation!
• Take what you want and leave the rest.....p.s. we do pick up more as we keeping coming back.
• Try the “New to OA” meeting every Saturday at 6PM through Oregon Intergroup.
• oa.org - find a virtual meeting
• Let go of defiance; and remember you have a choice; you don't HAVE to do anything; you are choosing to do this!
• you are welcome you are deserving you are special and you are not alone
• tradition 3, together we get better
• It's a we program!
• It's ODAT, I don't give up eating a certain food for the rest of my life, but for today, I choose not to eat it.
• let us love you  until you love yourself
• Here's my phone number, you're very welcome to call.
• Get a sponsor
• Keep a journal from day 1 to reflect on as you go through your program.
• the only way you fail is to leave
• OA is the "Good Clean Plate Program" at a buffet of ideas.  Take what you want, and leave the rest. However, you might consider taking what you need and leave the rest.
• know that you can't do it wrong ❤
• a desire to stop eating compulsively is the only requirement
• this is a rough time to join a fellowship. congratulations on your bravery. keep coming back.
• Ask someone if they would like a temp sponsor!  it helps!
• Give yourself some grace while learning the lingo and ask questions if you don't understand!
• A sponsor helps in working the 12 Steps and progressing in your recovery. It is okay to ask for a sponsor, even if you are new.
• bring your journal to meetings to take notes for recovery tips!
• Keep coming back and keep trying new things, even if abstinence eludes you.
• Join a Step Study Group
• life will change, the world will change, you will change over the long haul. but this can be the thread of your life....
• go to oaregion1.org/sponsorship.html to get a sponsor
• Ask someone to take you through the Newcomer's First 12 Days.  (Let newcomers know about this resource. 12 Days may seem do-able to a newcomer and make it easier to start.)

 
One thing I would like to commit to adding to my program for the rest of 2020:

• 30 meetings in 30 days....30 phone calls in 30 days...30 meditations in 30 days.  Set up a calendar for whatever you decide to do 30 days on!  Keep it Simple.  :)
• More meditation...walking meditation
• A E I O U 10th Step:   a = abstinence    e = exercise   I = what I did for myself   o = what did I do for others   u = what was uncomfortable (more classic 10th step)  (some people add “Y” for Yahoo’s/Gratitudes) to the above format
• Begin looking at the Principles of the Steps/Traditions/Concepts
• Go to a meeting in every state / every province / why not in other countries?
• Ask for willingness, then act on it as soon as it comes!
• look at my food plan.  Not perfection, but ask my sponsor if I can start committing my food.  Or, find a food plan partner.
• I felt JOY at the idea of attending meetings in other countries -- I'm going to start doing that!
• oa region 9 can take you to Europe meetings
• Make outreach calls on a weekly basis
• really committing to an action plan, including being more open to service.
• continue project -- catch myself in being negative toward myself. work on this and make more progress.
• start a daily practice that supports my well-being for the day -- commit to making this a more regular, daily thing each morning
• Have been working on my action plan.  Have made an action plan surrounding food plan, which helps me eat more regularly and on time. This helps me with daily routine.
• reach out to newcomers. call out and be humble and real
• Daily 3:00 tea time when depression sets in.
• I want to commit to loving myself fiercely for the rest of the year. Being kind to myself.
• Wake up and say I'm glad to be alive and today I'm going to be excited!
• I would tell newcomers that OA has taught me tons of new tools to live my life free of food addiction, obsession, and shame.
• So grateful for this experience. All the best to you for the next 24
• I love this banquet of ideas and the fact you set it up to record commitments in chat!!!

  
Thank you to everyone for your amazing shares!