“That does not help me because I cannot stop. It just makes me hate myself more to know I’m killing myself.” --Taste of Lifeline, page 177

The title of the story is “Letting Go” in Taste of Lifeline on page 177. I could not do this for the longest time in OA. I have been around the rooms for many years and even though I had lost over 50 pounds twice in program I could not keep my abstinence after my Dad died in 2011 for any long period of time. My friends were concerned, and my family saw me with many medical issues that kept stacking up against me. I knew the OA program was my answer, but I didn’t see how it could work for me. My diet mentality was back, and my spirituality was out the door. I needed help and I needed to find serenity again in my life.

I have learned over again that I need to let go and stop trying to control the outcome. HP is in charge, and I am not. I had met a Nutritionist that I could relate to and tell my truth. I didn’t find anyone before this person who would listen and understand my pain. She made recommendations
and I followed most of them. She is still part of my support system today. There was one thing she said that I just put out of my mind because at that time I didn’t have insurance that would cover the surgery. I also thought it would go against what I heard in the OA rooms and didn’t want to go there. I was very stubborn!

HP did not give up on me. People, places, and things were put in front of me and showed me the way. It took years, good insurance, the right medical staff, and the support from OA members to get me to accept help and a solution to this baffling disease that we call compulsive eating. I had to let go of my old ideas and be open to the grace of my Higher Power to find abstinence and a new way of living.

I have released over 110 pounds and have been abstinent for 21 months. I feel better and have a lightness of heart that makes me want to sing the praises of Overeaters Anonymous and what it has done for my life. My spirit is free, and my life is fabulous. This has nothing to do with weight loss, but everything to do with letting go and letting HP give me what I could not do for myself. I am still working on letting go of things I have no control over and that is a work in progress. Today I can say “I love you, Martha!” and that was very hard two years ago. This program continues to save my soul, and I am grateful for the journey!
​
Martha R 
Second Vice Chair

​Before I came into OA, I had no hope.  I also had no self-esteem, no self-worth, nor any real purpose or drive.  I had no idea I had a disease or that I was a compulsive eater.  I loved learning why I couldn’t “will” myself to be different.  I have loved learning to develop a power greater than myself that helps me to have freedom from food compulsion.  I rely on this power, who I choose to call my Higher Power, to get me through each day in a way so much different than I could have ever imagined. 
 
I often say at meetings that what keeps me coming back is all these character defects. I am never going to get over them, and I need to use all the tools every day to manage them.  But I’ve learned that’s not entirely true.  I keep coming back because in our fellowship is where I have hope.  Every day, going to meetings, picking up our literature, developing my food plan, doing my nightly inventory--these are the things my hope is derived from.  I know now that if I do today what I did yesterday I will continue to stay abstinent and continue to like myself.  Abstinence is the root of my recovery.  Without it, I am running on self-will run riot.  I am miserable and afraid and hopeless.
 
I keep coming back because I have hope to keep getting better.  I have hope to NOT rely on those nasty character defects to get me through situations, but to rely fully on a power greater than myself to get me through everything.  And if I need an audible connection, I have hope that I’ll make a reach-out call and allow my Higher Power to speak through you, one of my amazing fellows.
 
Hope has inspired me to be of service.  Carrying the message of recovery, working with rescue dogs and their organizations, and volunteering to help protect our public lands and waters is very rewarding, uplifting and energizing.  You could say that being of service has built up my self-esteem.  Being of service, believe it or not, has also taught me self-care.  Or was that my Higher Power...? 😊
 
Being kind and tolerant of those I don’t agree with is a miracle of our program.  I have experience and hope that when I work with my Higher Power, I can accept people, places and things I could never have imagined.  It feels good to be kind in those difficult moments.  I have hope that I will grow in those moments!  All I need to do is to rely on a power greater than myself. 
 
One of my favorite things I've learned recently is that if I stay in the hope, I stay out of the fear.  Much in the same way that if I stay in the gratitude, I stay out of the negative thoughts.  I have hope that I can choose recovery.  And when I am weak, I have you all, always.  You are all just a phone call or text away.  I know you will listen.  I have hope you’ll understand.  I am amazed at the love and peace I can find in our program and in our fellowship.
 
This hope isn’t a flimsy reed.  From the Big Book (page 28) “What seemed at first a flimsy reed, has proved to be the loving and powerful hand of God. A new life has been given us or, if you prefer, 'a design for living' that really works.”  

​I am willing to go to any lengths to keep this hope, my abstinence and sanity.  Oh gosh, the sanity, that’s a whole other blog!  My recovery gives me hope and let that be the message I carry today and always.  There is hope for the still suffering compulsive overeater.  It works, if we work it, and we’re worth it!
 
Thanks for reading and allowing me to be of service.  Much love to you.
 
Laurie A. - Region One

Last weekend I had the chance to attend a virtual retreat sponsored by North Cascade Intergroup.  Although the retreat took place over the entire weekend, my schedule allowed me to pop in only for Saturday afternoon.  
 
Finding she had a bit more time following a review of Steps 8 and 9, the speaker turned to one of my favorite stories in the back of the Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous), “Acceptance was the Answer.”  Some of you long-timers might know this story by its previous title, "Doctor, Alcoholic, Addict."  Page 449 was frequently quoted by many in our program for the place to go on "acceptance"; now it is on page 417 in the Fourth Edition.  
 
Our speaker shared frank personal examples of her own beliefs and behaviors that matched those of the writer of this story.  Here are a few excerpts that resonated with me:
 
"When I complain about me or about you, I am complaining about God's handiwork.  I am saying I know better than God." (page 417)
 
Yep - I've had a tendency recently to truly believe I know how to run others' lives (Whose lives?  My husband's, daughter's, mother's, for starters).  What an ego!  And what an energy drain to have to think about and point out what others should be doing!  It also seems like I've done a bit too much complaining about what or who isn't ok in my life, when it's exactly the way it should be according to my HP's plan.
 
"When I focus on what's good today, I have a good day, and when I focus on what's bad, I have a bad day.  If I focus on a problem, the problem increases; if I focus on the answer, the answer increases." (page 419) 
 
Just last night after dinner I found myself slipping into the depths of despair. Nothing horrible had happened; evenings can often be times of day when I fall into negativity.  Fortunately, I realized I could adjust my attitude, that things would be ok, and I did the next indicated thing, which happened to be cleaning up the kitchen.  And after a few minutes, I felt better.  
 
And my favorite: 
 
At the bottom of page 413 this physician describes an old idea, and then later, a new idea:
 
"In the hospital I hung on to the idea I'd had most of my life:  that if I could just control the external environment, the internal environment would then become comfortable.  Much of my time was spent writing letters, notes, orders and lists of things for Max, who was also my office nurse, to do to keep the world running while I was locked up."
 
At the top of page 414:  
 
"Each with the other as a witness, we took the Third Step out loud--just as it says in the Big Book.  And life keeps getting simpler and easier as we try to reverse my old idea, by taking care of the internal environment via the Twelve Steps, and letting the external environment take care of itself." 
 
I love that I can become willing to set aside an idea that doesn't work, and pick up one that does.  It's that daily surrender of big or small things, and being open to a different result.    
 
We all love a good story of experience, strength and hope, and I am grateful to our retreat speaker for bringing this one back into my view.
 

Cindy C. – Region One

My OA friend said, “I have an assignment from my sponsor.  Can you tell me about your Second Step experience?”  I didn’t have an immediate answer.
 
Later that week I was reading a wonderful story in the Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th edition) titled “A Drunk, Like You.” On page 405 a spiritual awakening was discussed.  Aah!  My friend had been asking about my spiritual awakening!  In the story, the writer was disappointed that he hadn’t had a “more dramatic” spiritual awakening.
 
I was transported back to 1976, when I first entered the rooms of the 12 Steps at the tender age of 26. I had accompanied a friend who didn’t want to go alone.  I had been very depressed, but didn’t know that I was about to find the answer I needed. Walking into that room is something I’ll never forget.  It felt like walking into sunshine (and it was winter in Fairbanks, Alaska). I felt loved and accepted. And I kept coming back. That was my first spiritual awakening!
 
Jumping ahead to 1987. I was no longer a member of that first fellowship.  I was desperate to lose weight. I saw an ad for Overeaters Anonymous in the paper and wondered if it could be a Big Book fellowship. Their meeting was held fifteen minutes after I got off work and only three doors away, so I brought my Big Book and found that they were starting a Big Book study that night!  It was a renewal of my spiritual awakening.  Here was where I belonged!
 
Fast forward to 2009. We had moved and moved again. I had wandered away again. I had tried other methods of weight control.  Nothing worked. I got the bright idea of going to an Oregon OA retreat to get back on the wagon, but thought that afterward I wouldn’t have to attend meetings afterward—that I’d be able to do it by myself. But I discovered at the retreat that I love meetings!

Later that year we had to move again, back to my home town of Ketchikan to care for my mother.  I found an ad for OA in the paper, but when I went to the meeting no one else showed up.  I called the paper and was told the meeting wasn’t happening and they didn’t know how the ad had gotten back in the paper.  The time and place for a meeting were provided for me, and there were many weeks of just myself attending, but slowly a fellowship has grown around me.

I pray I have learned the lesson for good that this is where I belong and where I can stay spiritually awake, growing in recovery!
 
Lesley – Region One
 

PLEASE DO NOT INCLUDE LAST NAMES IN BLOG POST COMMENTS

“Is this really an OA meeting?”

M. asked about a meeting which only used the AA Big Book and not any OA literature.  She was upset with the meeting and wondered if this was “really” an OA meeting since they didn’t use OA literature.  This is my response as a Trustee. 
 
M.,
 
To me this situation is a bit of a dilemma because the AA Big Book is in fact OA approved literature.  And I can sure understand why you are confused by the attitude of some of this group’s members.  I love the Big Book and its message has play a huge part in my recovery – but so have several of the OA books.   I particularly like the Overeaters Anonymous Third Edition.
 
In general, I love OA literature because I get to hear my story.  OA literature is written by compulsive eaters for compulsive eaters.  That being said, according to Tradition 4, “Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or OA as a whole.”  This gives each group the right and responsibility to operate as they see fit.  The OA 12 and 12 goes on to discuss some of the matters that do affect OA as a whole.  They include having another affiliation, ignoring one or more of the Traditions, depending on a handful of members for leadership instead of trusting the group conscience, limiting membership, promoting non-OA approved literature at meetings, focusing on topics not related to recovery, promoting outside enterprises and issues, breaking another members’ anonymity, accepting free service or rent from outside people or institutions or forgetting our primary purpose.
 
It is a break of OA Tradition to bring in outside literature.  The best way to handle that would be to speak up and simply say that it bothers you to have outside literature brought in – no matter what the outside stuff is. 
 
When I speak up about a Tradition break, I often come across much harsher than I mean to because it is so hard to speak against others when I am pretty sure they don’t agree.  I find that if I gently and say something like “Have you thought about this outside stuff being a break of Tradition?” Or simply and quietly stating that you object and not push the point. 
 
Even when I am right it does not convince others if I am too forceful – unfortunately I have done that several times.  OA is broad and inclusive as long as the group is using the 12 Steps and 12 Traditions as the basis for the meeting.
 
I hope these suggestions are helpful to you.  You are welcome to contact me any time either through the Region One website or directly.
 
In love and service,
Margie – Region One