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SPECIAL FOCUS GROUPS IN OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS

5/10/2021

3 Comments

 
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Tradition Three says that the only requirement for membership in Overeaters Anonymous (OA) is the desire to stop eating compulsively. Tradition Four states that each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or OA as a whole. 

Have you noticed a recent trend toward special focus groups (groups which are specifically for members who share one trait)?  I believe that this is a wonderful thing, a finding of identity. Identity is the spiritual principle of Tradition Three.  Some of us, especially those who have been around OA for a long time, want everything to stay the same as it has always been.  But slowly, over time, we have allowed many things which we didn’t want to let into OA when the subject was first raised. I would much rather be an “elder statesman” than a “bleeding deacon” (or a “stick in the mud”).  I have been around OA for over forty years now, therefore I have a wealth of experience from which to draw perspective.  On the other hand, when I first came into OA, we did not worry about lots of things, and I like the “let them whirl” attitude of not correcting what others are doing.  I try to stay with correcting my own behaviors and attitudes rather than watching for what others are doing wrong.  It is not my job to be the OA Traditions police. 

Each OA group has the right to do things wrong.  One of my pet peeves is the practice of only reading one Tradition per week at meetings. However, that is NOT against Traditions and so I may grumble, but it is not my job as a Trustee to push my will on others. 

Tradition Four allows each meeting to have its own ways of doing things, unless it affects other groups or OA as a whole.   Both the OA and the AA “12x12” books (The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Overeaters Anonymous and The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous) have interesting anecdotes about experiences with these Traditions. 

One of the stories I enjoy in Tradition Three is about how early in AA, they were very afraid of losing their meetings and their sobriety.  They wanted to keep certain people out and only allow “pure and respectable alcoholics” in.  So, the General Service Office asked that each group to send in its list of “protective” regulations.  The total list of those to be excluded was huge: beggars, tramps, asylum inmates, prisoners, queers, plain crackpots, fallen women, atheists, and more. Those early AA members suddenly realized that if all those rules had been in effect everywhere, no one could possibly have joined AA!  They came to their senses and made the only requirement for membership the desire to stop drinking.

When I came into OA, I think there were some members who would have been very happy if I had gone away--I didn’t believe in the God that those sweet little ladies believed in, plus I had taken drugs and had sex.  But I did have the desire to stop eating compulsively.

These days, people seem to be asking for more special focus groups. Based on some of the experience above, I say let them do it.  It may be that some of those members can start their recovery journey in a special focus group and stay in OA to support all other compulsive eaters toward recovery.  I stayed, even though some people rolled their eyes when I shared, but they didn’t kick me out and I kept coming back until I too found recovery.

So, love and accept them all, even if they challenge your beliefs.  Accept their right to work OA their own way. 
​
Margie G. – Region One

3 Comments

READING ALL TWELVE TRADITIONS

10/12/2020

2 Comments

 
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In the area where I live there is a practice in the meeting format which I disagree with--that is the practice of only reading one Tradition per meeting rather than reading all Twelve Traditions. 
 
The first thing I need to say is that this is NOT a practice which is against OA Traditions.   There is nothing in the Traditions which says anything about this issue.   Each meeting is autonomous and may choose which readings to read at each meeting. 
 
I really feel that it is much better for us as overeaters to hear both the Twelve Steps and the Twelve Traditions read at every meeting.  We forget those things which work for us and hearing them read every week really strengthens our ability to remember them. 
 
I know when I was new and not feeling very strong in my abstinence, it was helpful for me to hear every week that the only requirement for membership was to have a desire to stop eating compulsively.    But if the people in my meeting only read that Tradition during one month of the year I might not have heard it, and may have given up on OA and on myself. 
 
And who can do without being reminded of Unity, no opinion on outside issues, that leaders do not get to govern, and that we need to be self-supporting?  We also need to hear that our Primary Purpose is to carry the message to others, about attraction rather than promotion, and that anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our Traditions. 
 
I really believe that we need to continue to read all our Traditions every week in every OA meeting.  But this is simply my opinion.  So please know that no one is doing it wrong if they do not agree. 
 
In love and service,
Margie G. - Region 1

2 Comments

FeelinG Connected to Hope & Unity

2/25/2020

1 Comment

 
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As I think about Unity Day coming up on February 29, I wonder about this celebration and I ask myself: how will acknowledging this day make any difference in my recovery?  So I started reading, and then reflecting on what it means to be united in this fellowship:
 
“No matter what problem I have with food, I am welcome.”
I am united in the solution to our common problem.  I begin to recover because I can identify with your weaknesses and actions around food.
 
“It is our weaknesses, not strengths that bind us.”
We are a group of people who would not normally mix, and yet…It doesn’t matter what your faith looks like.  It doesn't matter what your gender, or sexual preference is.  My sponsor is a different faith than I am, and yet when I have a struggle and need help she encourages and reminds me to pray.  How amazing is that?  We are of different beliefs but she encourages me to pray to my Higher Power.
 
“We are all together now reaching out for power and strength...”
We reach out to each other because, in spite of our differences, we have so much more in common that connects us.  Your strong recovery helps to strengthen mine. 
 
Last year I took part in a United Day celebration from a different OA fellowship than mine.  During the hour, a lovely gal gave each one of us a white rose. As she handed them out one by one, she mentioned how grateful she was for each person as she did.  I felt so welcomed and loved and united to this group even though all she said to me was “Thank you for coming here today to be with us.”  That small act made me feel like such a grateful part of this fellowship and definitely united in their love.

It is definitely beyond my wildest dreams!
 
So grateful to be united with you,

Nadine D.
OA Region1 Member at Large


1 Comment
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