Then we went on a riverboat dinner cruise. My mistake was that I didn’t inquire ahead of time what the meal was going to be. When we got there I had a choice between a food that contained sugar and a food that contained corn flour. I already knew from experience that sugar and flour will lead to food cravings but my "forgetter" forgot and told me "maybe this time you can have corn flour," so I ate it. Later in the meal there was a sugary dessert that I easily did not eat, so I told myself "see, you’re fine" and I was fine that evening.
The next day I was fine, but in the evening I found myself eating a corn flour item.
The day after that, I had the great idea to drink a sugary drink and eat whatever I wanted all day. I took a day off from my food plan!
The following morning I ate two sugary and floury items for breakfast and knew it had to STOP.
I said a prayer, made some calls, did some writing, read some literature, listened to a podcast, went to a meeting and basically dove back into program and straightened myself out. The rest of that day I was abstinent and I’ve been abstinent since.
I learned some important things from that experience. Even though I did a lot of things to stay abstinent on my trip, I failed to plan for dinner on the riverboat. I also had not yet adopted the attitude that my trigger foods are not allowed under any circumstance. With a NO MATTER WHAT attitude, I wouldn’t have eaten the corn flour, and with a little planning, I could have brought my food with me.
Thank goodness I didn’t do what the old me used to do…give up because I messed up. Instead, I’m learning what the experience had to teach me, dusting myself off and jumping right back into the middle of program. By the way, nothing I ate made me feel even close to how great abstinence feels. Plus it gave me heartburn which I hadn’t experienced in years! I’ve released 70 pounds, and I don’t want to ever go back to how it felt to carry that extra weight around. OA shows me how to stay abstinent, happy joyous and free and for that I am grateful.
Lynne F. - Sequim, Washington