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SPECIAL FOCUS GROUPS IN OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS

5/10/2021

3 Comments

 
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Tradition Three says that the only requirement for membership in Overeaters Anonymous (OA) is the desire to stop eating compulsively. Tradition Four states that each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or OA as a whole. 

Have you noticed a recent trend toward special focus groups (groups which are specifically for members who share one trait)?  I believe that this is a wonderful thing, a finding of identity. Identity is the spiritual principle of Tradition Three.  Some of us, especially those who have been around OA for a long time, want everything to stay the same as it has always been.  But slowly, over time, we have allowed many things which we didn’t want to let into OA when the subject was first raised. I would much rather be an “elder statesman” than a “bleeding deacon” (or a “stick in the mud”).  I have been around OA for over forty years now, therefore I have a wealth of experience from which to draw perspective.  On the other hand, when I first came into OA, we did not worry about lots of things, and I like the “let them whirl” attitude of not correcting what others are doing.  I try to stay with correcting my own behaviors and attitudes rather than watching for what others are doing wrong.  It is not my job to be the OA Traditions police. 

Each OA group has the right to do things wrong.  One of my pet peeves is the practice of only reading one Tradition per week at meetings. However, that is NOT against Traditions and so I may grumble, but it is not my job as a Trustee to push my will on others. 

Tradition Four allows each meeting to have its own ways of doing things, unless it affects other groups or OA as a whole.   Both the OA and the AA “12x12” books (The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Overeaters Anonymous and The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous) have interesting anecdotes about experiences with these Traditions. 

One of the stories I enjoy in Tradition Three is about how early in AA, they were very afraid of losing their meetings and their sobriety.  They wanted to keep certain people out and only allow “pure and respectable alcoholics” in.  So, the General Service Office asked that each group to send in its list of “protective” regulations.  The total list of those to be excluded was huge: beggars, tramps, asylum inmates, prisoners, queers, plain crackpots, fallen women, atheists, and more. Those early AA members suddenly realized that if all those rules had been in effect everywhere, no one could possibly have joined AA!  They came to their senses and made the only requirement for membership the desire to stop drinking.

When I came into OA, I think there were some members who would have been very happy if I had gone away--I didn’t believe in the God that those sweet little ladies believed in, plus I had taken drugs and had sex.  But I did have the desire to stop eating compulsively.

These days, people seem to be asking for more special focus groups. Based on some of the experience above, I say let them do it.  It may be that some of those members can start their recovery journey in a special focus group and stay in OA to support all other compulsive eaters toward recovery.  I stayed, even though some people rolled their eyes when I shared, but they didn’t kick me out and I kept coming back until I too found recovery.

So, love and accept them all, even if they challenge your beliefs.  Accept their right to work OA their own way. 
​
Margie G. – Region One

3 Comments

A DIFFERENT VIEW OF ANONYMITY

2/1/2021

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In the back of the Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th edition) on page 563 is “The Long Form” of the Twelve Traditions.  This is how the Traditions first appeared in 1946.

The long form of the Twelfth Tradition starts on page 565:

“12.—And finally, we of Alcoholics Anonymous believe that the principle of anonymity has an immense spiritual significance.  It reminds us that we are to place principles before personalities; that we are actually to practice a genuine humility.  This to the end that our great blessings may never spoil us; that we shall forever live in thankful contemplation of Him who presides over us all.”

I really love this reading; it helps me remember that there is something bigger than me. Bigger than the conflict between me and that other person who wants us to do it her way instead of my way—the right way.  It makes me want to act like a saner and more giving person. 

Often in OA we get stuck on the idea that anonymity is about not using our names with public media.  That is one of the meanings of anonymity, but it is not the only meaning.

One of the synonyms of anonymity is “namelessness.”  That is why we do not put the names of speakers on OA event flyers or schedules.  The emphasis is on the topic rather than the person.  We do not put names of authors on OA literature either.  We say, “my sponsor told me….” rather than “Jean told me…”  When I say my sponsor says to read xxx; I might as well say the OA program says to read xxx.  That way I honor the process and the program, not one specific person.

I love doing service at a “high” level, but I try to stay humble about it because I have seen people get very wrapped up in being the person in charge or who is at the top.  In OA we only hold positions a short time and then we rotate on to other positions and allow someone else to fill the “top spot.”  Sometimes I have seen people gain weight after being in a top-level position.  I know that I have certain strengths, but I also have weaknesses and so do other people. I do not want to lose my abstinence after being in a high position.  I know that my recovery is worth far more to me than any OA service position. This “Long Form of the Twelfth Tradition” helps me stay right-sized.

Margie G. – Region One
  
 
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GRATITUDE IN ACTION:  REMEMBERING HELEN F.

11/23/2020

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Maybe it’s Covid, or the recent death of my dear sister-in-law, or taking on two service positions for the upcoming year, but I’ve been thinking a lot about Helen F. 

Helen was already a long-time member of OA when I joined in 1983.  She was one of the incorporators of our Intergroup in 1981, and I don’t think there was an intergroup position that she didn’t hold at one time or another.  Helen was all about service—with a capital S. 

​For years, she had a second telephone line in her home for the OA hot-line and never failed to take a call or return one, whether it was a newcomer or a current member who needed her. 


I remember one time, shopping at Costco and being totally overwhelmed by all the samples that demonstrators were urging me to try.  Like a beacon of light, I saw Helen and made a mad dash to get to her before she disappeared in the crowds.  That was Helen, an OA member who was calm and calming, a fount of OA knowledge and practical advice, a woman of great spiritual depth.  I could never count the number of times that Helen said “God will provide,” and he did, and I believed that he would because Helen said so. 

A member at a recent Intergroup meeting said that Service is gratitude in action.  I like that statement.  Helen was gratitude in action.  She gave her all for the Fellowship in sponsorship, meeting attendance, telephone outreach, taking on service positions—anything and everything that needed to be done. 

As Helen aged and was no longer able to give service, she still showed up at her committed meetings and Intergroup meetings.  Her calm, loving presence was Service. 

I still miss Helen, but am grateful for her and often when I’m feeling fear or anxiety and I open my mind for an intuitive thought, I can almost hear her voice telling me, “God will provide.”

 Paula Z. – Region One



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​HAPPY BIRTHDAY OA!

1/20/2020

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OA was founded by Rozanne S. and two other women in January 1960 in a small kitchen in Los Angeles, California.  We all owe Rozanne a HUGE debt for having the dedication and drive it took to make what was a unique idea for 1-2 people into an amazing world-wide organization helping thousands of people find recovery from food addiction.  Our own personal recovery is part of those thousands!

It's hard to believe that from Rozanne’s small home office in 1960, OA today has a world headquarters, the World Service Office, located in Rio Rancho, New Mexico. Overeaters Anonymous estimates its membership at over 60,000 people in about 6,500 groups meeting in over 75 countries.
​
An OA 60th birthday weekend event is happening in Los Angeles while I write this blog.  There are over 800 OA members from all around the world sharing recovery through the weekend in breakout sessions and fellowship that really started long ago in Rozanne's kitchen and office!

We can pay our debt of gratitude to Rozanne S. by each one of us reaching out to share the hope that OA continues to offer today for relief from food addiction!  We are SO fortunate to have additional opportunities for recovery via technology today that Rozanne couldn’t fathom in 1960, but whatever the method of delivery, the OA “secret” remains the 12 Steps of Overeaters Anonymous! 

Three Cheers to OA!!!

Sue B. - Region 1

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SHARING HOPE:  KEEP IT SIMPLE

8/8/2019

2 Comments

 
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Over the last several weeks I've been thinking a lot about "Keep It Simple," as Dr. Bob reminded Bill W.:  "Remember, Bill, let's not louse this thing up. Let's keep it simple." (Dr. Bob and the Good Oldtimers, p. 343)
 
In so many of my service circles we lament about the shrinking of our fellowship and what it will take to grow it again.  It feels like a big job.  But I am reminded that all I have to do is simply carry the message to the best of my ability - that means showing up for meetings and doing what I can to add to the experience, strength and hope in the room.   Whenever possible, I'm trying to share about "what I was like, what happened, and what I'm like now."  
 
After all, why would anyone come back to OA unless they hear about what separates this program from the hundreds of other options?  We have food plans, but so does everyone else.  But, if I hear someone say "food had me by the throat; it was the most important thing in my life, but the 12 steps and my higher power have relieved the obsession," that's unique.
 
At one of the World Service Business Conference workshops titled "Attracting Young People," one presenter who came into the program at 17 and the other in his early 20's, shared about what attracted them to the fellowship and kept them coming back. A key takeaway for me was that it wasn't about sitting in the rooms with other young people, it was hearing about attractive recovery from anyone of any age. The younger set wants to hear from older fellows who also came into the program young.  Workshop attendees were encouraged to share a message with weight and depth when talking about recovery in meetings.  
 
When I get all wound up about how to "save OA" and increase membership, I need only remember to carry the message as I have been taught to the best of my ability.  That's "keeping it simple!"
 
Cindy C. - Region 1

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