Maybe it’s Covid, or the recent death of my dear sister-in-law, or taking on two service positions for the upcoming year, but I’ve been thinking a lot about Helen F. 

Helen was already a long-time member of OA when I joined in 1983.  She was one of the incorporators of our Intergroup in 1981, and I don’t think there was an intergroup position that she didn’t hold at one time or another.  Helen was all about service—with a capital S. 

​For years, she had a second telephone line in her home for the OA hot-line and never failed to take a call or return one, whether it was a newcomer or a current member who needed her. 

I remember one time, shopping at Costco and being totally overwhelmed by all the samples that demonstrators were urging me to try.  Like a beacon of light, I saw Helen and made a mad dash to get to her before she disappeared in the crowds.  That was Helen, an OA member who was calm and calming, a fount of OA knowledge and practical advice, a woman of great spiritual depth.  I could never count the number of times that Helen said “God will provide,” and he did, and I believed that he would because Helen said so. 

A member at a recent Intergroup meeting said that Service is gratitude in action.  I like that statement.  Helen was gratitude in action.  She gave her all for the Fellowship in sponsorship, meeting attendance, telephone outreach, taking on service positions—anything and everything that needed to be done. 

As Helen aged and was no longer able to give service, she still showed up at her committed meetings and Intergroup meetings.  Her calm, loving presence was Service. 

I still miss Helen, but am grateful for her and often when I’m feeling fear or anxiety and I open my mind for an intuitive thought, I can almost hear her voice telling me, “God will provide.”

 Paula Z. – Region One



PLEASE DO NOT INCLUDE LAST NAME IN BLOG POST COMMENTS.

“Is this really an OA meeting?”

M. asked about a meeting which only used the AA Big Book and not any OA literature.  She was upset with the meeting and wondered if this was “really” an OA meeting since they didn’t use OA literature.  This is my response as a Trustee. 
 
M.,
 
To me this situation is a bit of a dilemma because the AA Big Book is in fact OA approved literature.  And I can sure understand why you are confused by the attitude of some of this group’s members.  I love the Big Book and its message has play a huge part in my recovery – but so have several of the OA books.   I particularly like the Overeaters Anonymous Third Edition.
 
In general, I love OA literature because I get to hear my story.  OA literature is written by compulsive eaters for compulsive eaters.  That being said, according to Tradition 4, “Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or OA as a whole.”  This gives each group the right and responsibility to operate as they see fit.  The OA 12 and 12 goes on to discuss some of the matters that do affect OA as a whole.  They include having another affiliation, ignoring one or more of the Traditions, depending on a handful of members for leadership instead of trusting the group conscience, limiting membership, promoting non-OA approved literature at meetings, focusing on topics not related to recovery, promoting outside enterprises and issues, breaking another members’ anonymity, accepting free service or rent from outside people or institutions or forgetting our primary purpose.
 
It is a break of OA Tradition to bring in outside literature.  The best way to handle that would be to speak up and simply say that it bothers you to have outside literature brought in – no matter what the outside stuff is. 
 
When I speak up about a Tradition break, I often come across much harsher than I mean to because it is so hard to speak against others when I am pretty sure they don’t agree.  I find that if I gently and say something like “Have you thought about this outside stuff being a break of Tradition?” Or simply and quietly stating that you object and not push the point. 
 
Even when I am right it does not convince others if I am too forceful – unfortunately I have done that several times.  OA is broad and inclusive as long as the group is using the 12 Steps and 12 Traditions as the basis for the meeting.
 
I hope these suggestions are helpful to you.  You are welcome to contact me any time either through the Region One website or directly.
 
In love and service,
Margie – Region One

Rather than focus on the uncertainty we are all facing, I have tried to find the small blessings in these days of Covid quarantine. One major, unexpected blessing is the extended fellowship I have found by attending
the many Zoom meetings that are only available due to the quarantine.
 
One of these meetings offers members time to read affirmations and I wanted to pass these along to all of you.
 
When I first came into program, my sponsor had me look at myself in the mirror and say affirmations out loud to my reflection. This practice has helped me tremendously with self-acceptance. I hope this daily practice will help you too.
 
Alice W. - Region 1
 
AFFIRMATIONS*
 
BODY

• I can leave my body up to my higher power.
• I love _________ (name a part of your body.)
• My body is exactly the way it should be today.
• I refrain from abusing my body.
• My body has its own strength and grace.
• My body is beautiful and I will love and nurture it.
• My smile accentuates the beauty of my face.
• I enjoy feeling myself in my body.
• I accept and love my feminine aspects.
• My weight does not matter for today.
• I will not starve just for today.
• My higher power would not expect me to get less than I deserve in food, exercise, and other forms of body care.

 
SELF

• I am learning to refrain from self-criticism.
• I can depend on my higher power to help me with self-esteem.
• I accept and embrace myself.
• I have been blessed with many talents.
• I choose to look at the beauty life has to offer.
• I am full of joy and happiness.
• I am worthy and deserving of care and attention.
• I am a caring person and loved by many.
• I embrace change effortlessly.
• I can use the steps to rid myself of guilt and self-abuse.
• I accept my emotions and allow them creative expression.
• I am free to be a creative joyful being.
• My life force flows in balance with all things.
• I claim the deepest wisdom of my being.
• My higher power would not expect me to get less than I deserve in self-love and self-care.

 
SEX & RELATED ISSUES

• I bless and celebrate the feminine way of being.
• I give only when my cup overflows.
• I release sexual guilt and celebrate my sexuality.
• I do not fake my sexual responses.
• I own my sexuality.
• I own my body.
• I have healthy sexual boundaries.
• I can depend on my higher power to help with my sexual boundaries.

 
*These affirmations are from a Women's Self, Sexuality, & Body Issues OA meeting. Feel free to change any wording to suit your situation.

At a workshop we held with Snake River Intergroup last year, each participant placed a question about sponsorship in our "Ask-it Basket." Then each person chose a question at random from the basket, read it aloud and shared their own experience, strength and hope on the question.  Here are some of their great shares on sponsorship:

Q. How many sponsees is too many?

• It varies depending on your life circumstances.
• You want to have enough time to give them the attention they deserve.

Q. How much in-person vs over the phone/email/text works best? 

• Virtual sponsorship works if you work it.
• A mix is great if you are located in the same geographic area.
• I meet face to face once a week with my sponsor for a "walk and talk."
• I call my sponsor every morning at a set time for 15 minutes.
• My sponsor and I do a combo of texts and calls.

Q. What makes a sponsor a "tough" sponsor?

• Talking truth is important and it may be the first time someone has heard unvarnished truth.
• Setting clear guidelines and sticking to them is important.
• Asking hard questions.
• Asking "What are you willing to do TODAY for your recovery?"

Q. What do I do with someone who can't get abstinent?

• Ask the same question as above "What are you willing to do today for your recovery?"
• Nothing changes if nothing changes...
• Suggest:  Pray for willingness...ask for help...text me before that first compulsive bite...
• Use the Before You Take that First Compulsive Bite pamphlet as a writing exercise.
• Use the 12 Step Workbook of Overeaters Anonymous Step One questions.
• You can't want their recovery more than they do...

Q. What if I can't reach my sponsor?

• Develop your own OA support crew.
• Have the phone  number of members of your meetings.
• Call a newcomer.
• Listen to a podcast.
• Attend a phone meeting.
• Write a letter to your sponsor.

Here are more good questions about sponsorship:

• Should a sponsee always call me or can I call them?
• What is a binge? What is a slip versus a break in abstinence?
• When am I ready to sponsor? 
• How much time does sponsoring take?
• How can I find a sponsor?
• Why should I have a sponsor?  Why should I be a sponsor?

Feel free to share your answers to these questions in the comments.  Together we get better!  

Pat and Nadine - Region 1