My OA friend said, “I have an assignment from my sponsor.  Can you tell me about your Second Step experience?”  I didn’t have an immediate answer.
 
Later that week I was reading a wonderful story in the Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th edition) titled “A Drunk, Like You.” On page 405 a spiritual awakening was discussed.  Aah!  My friend had been asking about my spiritual awakening!  In the story, the writer was disappointed that he hadn’t had a “more dramatic” spiritual awakening.
 
I was transported back to 1976, when I first entered the rooms of the 12 Steps at the tender age of 26. I had accompanied a friend who didn’t want to go alone.  I had been very depressed, but didn’t know that I was about to find the answer I needed. Walking into that room is something I’ll never forget.  It felt like walking into sunshine (and it was winter in Fairbanks, Alaska). I felt loved and accepted. And I kept coming back. That was my first spiritual awakening!
 
Jumping ahead to 1987. I was no longer a member of that first fellowship.  I was desperate to lose weight. I saw an ad for Overeaters Anonymous in the paper and wondered if it could be a Big Book fellowship. Their meeting was held fifteen minutes after I got off work and only three doors away, so I brought my Big Book and found that they were starting a Big Book study that night!  It was a renewal of my spiritual awakening.  Here was where I belonged!
 
Fast forward to 2009. We had moved and moved again. I had wandered away again. I had tried other methods of weight control.  Nothing worked. I got the bright idea of going to an Oregon OA retreat to get back on the wagon, but thought that afterward I wouldn’t have to attend meetings afterward—that I’d be able to do it by myself. But I discovered at the retreat that I love meetings!

Later that year we had to move again, back to my home town of Ketchikan to care for my mother.  I found an ad for OA in the paper, but when I went to the meeting no one else showed up.  I called the paper and was told the meeting wasn’t happening and they didn’t know how the ad had gotten back in the paper.  The time and place for a meeting were provided for me, and there were many weeks of just myself attending, but slowly a fellowship has grown around me.

I pray I have learned the lesson for good that this is where I belong and where I can stay spiritually awake, growing in recovery!
 
Lesley – Region One
 

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I was able to attend the OA Birthday Party this weekend and thought I'd share about two sessions which were particularly meaningful to me.
 
Pitfalls that Lead to Relapse
The speaker shared a list of 17 items she had identified that can lead to relapse (as found in OA/AA literature).  One of those pitfalls is not taking daily quiet time (Step 11), and I realized that my head says I'm too busy to take this time on a daily basis.  Oops!  I needed the reminder that I do better when I make Step 11 a daily practice.  That time with my HP means that I am more likely to surrender and turn to that source of power when I want to crumble or resist a big wave of emotion, new situation, fear, etc.  
 
Sober Eating
Speakers in this Sunday morning session shared about "sober eating" leading to true freedom from food obsession. Lately food has been a struggle for me.  Maybe it's time to look at the foods and behaviors that I play cat-and-mouse with, still wanting them to to "work" for me (Steps 1, 2 and 3).  As one of the speakers worked with a volunteer to write a "contract" around food choices and behaviors, I wrote one for myself.  I will share my "contract" with another compulsive overeater today and ask my HP to help me stick with that contract.  I do want that feeling of freedom from compulsive overeating.  I've always believed that the freedom from food comes from a life transformed through the Steps but am realizing that for me right now it's also adhering to a food plan and maintaining a strong abstinence when that spiritual condition sustains some cracks.  In the end, my job is to surrender and it's my HP's job to change my food and my life!
 
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For those who missed the OA Birthday Party, I am sure that the recordings will be available soon.  Region One continues to add recordings from our November convention.  You'll find some wonderful speakers at https://www.oaregion1.org/audio--speakers.html.
 
Cindy C. - Region One 



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“But my darling, there’s no such thing as the light at the end of the tunnel, you must realize that you are the light.”  Anonymous
 
This always makes me feel so empowered.  It reminds me that I am in charge of my own recovery.
 
Light shines out of darkness.  When I first came to OA, I was in a very dark place.  I thought my problem was that I couldn’t stop eating at certain times. Over time I realized there was a much bigger reason why the food called to me.

• Selfishness in so needing your approval to feel ok about who I was.
• A tired, worn belief that my opinion didn’t matter.
• An obsession with body size and weight that took up way too much space in my head.

 
It was hard for me to shine when I kept dumping darkness on myself.
 
When I saw people recovering in the rooms of OA, the first thing I noticed was that they looked “lighter.”
 
Could it be that when we have hope, coupled with a faith that works for us and an honest desire, with courage to talk with a sponsor, that our load is lightened and it shows up on our face? It seems to me as we rid ourselves of the darkness, the lightness of our heart can begin to glow.
 
You know, light only has one purpose…to shine!

May you be a shining example of recovery this year and may your glow help light the way for others seeking the peace found in O.A.
 
Nadine D.- Region One

 
 
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Sometimes it’s good for me to take a minute and think about what I really know about myself after all this time in OA.  Am I really different?  In all this “turning over” of my will, my life, my character defects (Steps 3 and 6). What does that actually mean for me?
 
Here’s an example:  The discussion at a recent OA meeting was on “Amends we’ve made and how that affected us.”  It prompted something within me about a possible amends I needed to make to a relative. Talking with my sponsor, I realized it wasn’t an amends I needed to make, but a hurt I needed to deal with.  In dealing with that same hurt several years ago, this is what I did: “Wow, that hurt.  I better let it go because there’s nothing I can do and I don’t want to be resentful.”  Well, fast forward three years later and I’m crying over the same hurt.  I really hadn’t turned anything over to my Higher Power.  So, with the help of my sponsor, I wrote a letter to this person, who is now deceased.  I acknowledged the hurt, and I also recognized all the good and blessings that person gave me.  I asked God to remove my selfishness and my hanging onto thoughts that may not have been true. With this intentional act, came freedom.  I am free of it!
 
I also had to be clear about what character defects I’m giving up. That makes more sense to me more than just saying, “take it away, God.”
 
So, what do I know?  That my program is about surrender, action, and reliance upon my HP, who does for me what I cannot do for myself!  It does take work, but I am worth the effort.  My life is filled with peace by following these Steps. I know that I can live without confusion, resentment and fear if I keep connected to the source of my strength.
 
I am sure of it!
 
Nadine – Region 1

Sometimes, when I've read the Promises around step nine (Alcoholics Anonymous, pages 83-84) I've gotten hung up where it reads, "No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others."

I started having an internal dialogue about "how far down the scale" not really being applicable to overeaters, because clearly, we care much more about how far up the scale we had gone. I used to want to read it in my meetings as up-the-scale, until a few weeks ago.

Then, when someone else was reading the Promises, HP helped me set aside what I thought I knew for an open mind and a new experience. That day, I heard it with a completely different perspective; no matter how far down, Yes! Down!, we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others.

Maybe now more than ever, our experiences as we go down the scale are the most relevant for our fellows to hear. These are the stories that bring hope.

Nowadays, I can now see how it applies either way, and I have the tiniest smile when I hear the Promises. My heart and mind feel more open, and I am comforted in continually finding new meaning in old words. I share my experiences in the hope others will benefit. If there is the slightest chance they can avoid my mistakes, I'm happy to bare my soul, or describe how I climbed out of the hell in my head by following a few simple steps, turning my control issues over to HP, and going to meetings.

In Service to the Good of OA,

Avi R. - Region 1