“Practical experience shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics.  It works when other activities fail.” So begins Chapter 7 “Working with Others” in the Alcoholics Anonymous Big Book, p. 89. 

In 2015, I was recuperating at home from major surgery and could not go to the Portland OA meetings I usually attended.  My OA meetings, then, transitioned to phone meetings.  I heard a speaker talk about her recovery through applying the instructions found in the Big Book.   I called the speaker and asked her to guide and sponsor me through the Big Book.   Why not try it?  Nothing else was working for me.  She agreed.  One of the most important principles she continuously impressed upon me was service.

At first, service was just to keep me from compulsive overeating.  In working all of the Steps, my sponsor told me what Dr. Bob wrote on his prescription pad:  "trust God, clean house, help others."  A six-word synopsis of what I needed to do to become happy, joyous and free.

I started reaching out to newcomers I heard share at phone meetings.  I started to sponsor according to the Big Book instructions.  And I offered myself for outreach calls to any member who wanted to chat.

But sometimes there are no new sponsees or outreach calls.  Or if I make a call and ask “how are you?” the other party may be just fine and really doesn’t need any help from me.

So I had to expand my definition of “service.”  It wasn’t just for OA members.  It had to expand to every single person that showed up in my life: sponsees and outreach callers, for sure.  But I added friends, family, strangers, drivers, cashiers, waiters and waitresses---in other words, everyone to whom I could add an instant of joy.   My job was to be of service to absolutely everyone.

Here’s the miracle of that:  while I first started to do service to insure my abstinence, now (six years later), I actually WANT to do service for others. I WANT to make their lives a little cheerier by a kind word or gesture.  I WANT to brighten someone else’s day.  And the by-product of my desire is a fairly easy, smooth, and effective abstinence and food plan, not to mention healed relationships, peace of mind, weight loss, building of self-esteem, etc.

A couple of years ago I added something to serving others.  In 2017, I started leaving small gifts, such as Dollar Tree pencils with a reindeer motif, with tips at restaurants.  I gave them to the cashiers at McDonald’s, gas station attendants, my pharmacist, the receptionist at my dentist’s office.  Anyone doing service for others would get a little treat from me. And I soon added an inexpensive something to every other holiday during the year.  I just wanted to give that other person a smile:  a heart-shaped candy at Valentine’s Day, fun stickers for Independence Day or Thanksgiving.    

You’d think I gave these random people gold nuggets.  They smile, they say “thank you,” some say “you’ve made my day.”  Even the grumpiest lighten up a bit.  But I don’t do any of this to get a “thank you.”   NONE of this simple giving has anything to do with me.  But it sure has everything to do with my abstinence, my self-esteem, and my relationship with my Higher Power.

And that’s the gift I give myself.  It works when other activities fail.

Happy Holidays, my fellows.  And happiness throughout the coming year!

Anonymous
Guest Blogger

Thank you for my recovery. I owe my life to you, the twelve-step program of Overeaters Anonymous, and my Higher Power.

I thank my Higher Power every day for this amazing life that has unfolded before me. I thank the program by working the steps, practicing these principles in all of my affairs and stepping up for service whenever I hear the soft whisper of my Higher Power.

It first started as my heart pounding during a meeting, which my sponsor said was HP prompting me to share. Then no one was willing to take the key for the meeting that I desperately needed. (Remember when we all met in person?) That was HP creating the willingness to do a little bit more. Thank you for being the kind and loving sponsor that my HP knew I needed to work the Steps.
 
HP spoke through a newcomer who saw something in me that she wanted, so I started to sponsor. I was slowly led to take on more and more responsibility with each new service opportunity. HP used all of you to show me that I am someone who is trustworthy and to challenge me to grow.
 
Thank you for showing up. Thank you for greeting me at the door as if I was a dear friend and asking me my name. Thank you for asking me to read the promises from the Big Book, a reading that I had never heard before that touched my heart as if it was written just for me. Thank you for asking me to make coffee and heat the water for tea.

Thank you for taking the time to tell me to be gentle with myself after I shared about a disappointing misstep. Thank you for calling me when I stopped showing up to my regular meeting. Thank you for asking me to speak at your meeting. Thank you for asking me to be your sponsor. Thank you for asking me to represent our meeting at Intergroup. Thank you for attending Intergroup! And Region One Assembly. And WSBC.
 
Thank you – all of you – for loving me until I could love myself; for believing in my abilities when I thought I had none. For sticking with me when I was sure my way was the path I needed to be on. I would not be alive today if you had not been in my life.

​When you chose to attend the meeting instead of isolating, you helped me. When you made that outreach call, you helped me. When you planned that OA event, you furthered my recovery. When you shared your heart and your truth, you helped me open my heart and speak my truth. When you showed me your imperfections, you gave me the courage to share mine and know that I am still loved.
 
I have no doubt whatsoever that OA saved my life. This fellowship. Each and every one of you, regardless of where you are in your own recovery journey, have the power to save a life. Thank you for saving mine.
 
Alice W. - Region One

In Step One of the OA 12&12 (The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Overeaters Anonymous) it talks about believing my weight was the cause of my chronic unhappiness. I wrote in the margin of the book, “My chronic unhappiness is the cause of my obesity.” That was so very true when I first came to the program ten years ago. It took coming to OA and working the steps for me to uncover the driving forces behind my compulsive eating. I'm now grateful for my fat because it brought me here with enough desperation to be willing to go to any lengths to lose the weight – and so I have, in large measure.

I no longer carry the weight of trying to please everyone, I'm free of the heavy burden of feeling I am a failure, I've dropped the pounds of shame and resentment I always carried on my back, and have lost the ton of guilt over my angry outbursts.  I still have some hefty, emotional luggage I'm carrying around, but a huge weight has been removed from my daily living. I do feel the Sunshine of the Spirit bathing me in light and lightness.

When I concentrated on my size and weight I was unable to stop eating.  Now, as long as I stay within my Higher Power's will, my eating is for fuel and pleasure and I can leave the results up to the one who carries the weight of my whole life in his strong arms.


Mollie R., Idaho – Guest Blogger

Our Eleventh Step talks about prayer and meditation. Meditation continues to be a struggle for me. In many practices, one of the first instructions is to close your eyes. Because of my childhood trauma, the idea of closing my eyes doesn’t feel safe for me right now. I feel too exposed. Too vulnerable. I used to use this truth as a weapon against myself. “You think you’re recovered? You can’t even sit with your eyes closed. What kind of an example is that?!” the vicious voice of my disease chimes in at every opportunity.
 
It’s important to note that through working the Twelve Steps with a sponsor, and some outside help, I have experienced recovery beyond my wildest dreams. For the most part, I do not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. I believe in my heart that my experiences can benefit others. I know a new freedom and happiness. I feel useful and I am confident in my abilities. I have talents to share.   So where is my freedom from fear of other people?
 
Program has taught me to accept myself unconditionally. I love and accept my body – a miracle for someone who has tried to starve herself to maintain someone else’s unattainable ideal. I love who I am as a person, another miracle for someone who did not believe she was worth the space she took up in the world. And, I have a self-preservation skill that, so far, I am unable to, and may never be able to, let go of. I have a strong connection to my Higher Power. I know with all of my being that HP is with me 24/7, showing me grace and direction. And still, my instinct, when I try to close my eyes to meditate, is to recoil as if from a hot flame. The miracle here is that I am not a lesser person because of it. I accept it, refuse to let the voice of my disease define me, and remain open to other ways to quiet my mind so I can hear HP’s will for me. Because that is what meditation is all about – strengthening our connection with a power greater than ourselves. How we get there doesn’t matter.
 
So, how do I meditate? I go for a walk. Because of my past, it took a lot of work to be able to walk by myself. I stay vigilant, and present, paying attention to everything that is happening around me. As I do, something amazing happens: my mind begins to clear and I hear and feel an amazing inner silence. An overwhelming sense of peace. I feel safe. And in that safety, a thought materializes that leads me to my next action. A plan forms and I can visualize the path ahead. Random thoughts start to connect and form a coherent picture in my head. As I embrace whatever was just revealed to me, I feel a deep sense of joy.
 
Does this happen every time I walk? Not hardly. As anyone with a meditation practice will tell you, reaching the stillness is not always possible every time you sit. But when it does happen, it is profound and I feel an unbreakable bond with my Higher Power.
 
When I am not able to walk and I am feeling restless, irritable and discontent, I have learned to doodle. I sit at my desk or dining room table with a blank piece of paper. In the middle of the paper I write a word. One that calls to me in the moment. Examples include Peace, Beauty, Loneliness or Heartbreak. I draw a circle or box around the word, and I start to create patterns. The patterns flow easily out of me and onto the paper as I concentrate on the word in the center. The goal again is to quiet the stories I am telling myself and find a calmness to replace the restlessness. I open my heart to HP’s message for me. If I can’t seem to find the flow, I surrender to the process and release each self-judgment as it appears. Like any new skill, it took some practice to let go of my expectations and be present during the doodle meditation.
 
The point is that however we choose to quiet our minds and open our heart to a power greater than ourselves, the only way we can do it wrong is to not do it at all.
 
Alice W. – Region One

My OA friend said, “I have an assignment from my sponsor.  Can you tell me about your Second Step experience?”  I didn’t have an immediate answer.
 
Later that week I was reading a wonderful story in the Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th edition) titled “A Drunk, Like You.” On page 405 a spiritual awakening was discussed.  Aah!  My friend had been asking about my spiritual awakening!  In the story, the writer was disappointed that he hadn’t had a “more dramatic” spiritual awakening.
 
I was transported back to 1976, when I first entered the rooms of the 12 Steps at the tender age of 26. I had accompanied a friend who didn’t want to go alone.  I had been very depressed, but didn’t know that I was about to find the answer I needed. Walking into that room is something I’ll never forget.  It felt like walking into sunshine (and it was winter in Fairbanks, Alaska). I felt loved and accepted. And I kept coming back. That was my first spiritual awakening!
 
Jumping ahead to 1987. I was no longer a member of that first fellowship.  I was desperate to lose weight. I saw an ad for Overeaters Anonymous in the paper and wondered if it could be a Big Book fellowship. Their meeting was held fifteen minutes after I got off work and only three doors away, so I brought my Big Book and found that they were starting a Big Book study that night!  It was a renewal of my spiritual awakening.  Here was where I belonged!
 
Fast forward to 2009. We had moved and moved again. I had wandered away again. I had tried other methods of weight control.  Nothing worked. I got the bright idea of going to an Oregon OA retreat to get back on the wagon, but thought that afterward I wouldn’t have to attend meetings afterward—that I’d be able to do it by myself. But I discovered at the retreat that I love meetings!

Later that year we had to move again, back to my home town of Ketchikan to care for my mother.  I found an ad for OA in the paper, but when I went to the meeting no one else showed up.  I called the paper and was told the meeting wasn’t happening and they didn’t know how the ad had gotten back in the paper.  The time and place for a meeting were provided for me, and there were many weeks of just myself attending, but slowly a fellowship has grown around me.

I pray I have learned the lesson for good that this is where I belong and where I can stay spiritually awake, growing in recovery!
 
Lesley – Region One
 

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I was able to attend the OA Birthday Party this weekend and thought I'd share about two sessions which were particularly meaningful to me.
 
Pitfalls that Lead to Relapse
The speaker shared a list of 17 items she had identified that can lead to relapse (as found in OA/AA literature).  One of those pitfalls is not taking daily quiet time (Step 11), and I realized that my head says I'm too busy to take this time on a daily basis.  Oops!  I needed the reminder that I do better when I make Step 11 a daily practice.  That time with my HP means that I am more likely to surrender and turn to that source of power when I want to crumble or resist a big wave of emotion, new situation, fear, etc.  
 
Sober Eating
Speakers in this Sunday morning session shared about "sober eating" leading to true freedom from food obsession. Lately food has been a struggle for me.  Maybe it's time to look at the foods and behaviors that I play cat-and-mouse with, still wanting them to to "work" for me (Steps 1, 2 and 3).  As one of the speakers worked with a volunteer to write a "contract" around food choices and behaviors, I wrote one for myself.  I will share my "contract" with another compulsive overeater today and ask my HP to help me stick with that contract.  I do want that feeling of freedom from compulsive overeating.  I've always believed that the freedom from food comes from a life transformed through the Steps but am realizing that for me right now it's also adhering to a food plan and maintaining a strong abstinence when that spiritual condition sustains some cracks.  In the end, my job is to surrender and it's my HP's job to change my food and my life!
 
​
For those who missed the OA Birthday Party, I am sure that the recordings will be available soon.  Region One continues to add recordings from our November convention.  You'll find some wonderful speakers on our podcast page.
 
Cindy C. - Region One 



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“But my darling, there’s no such thing as the light at the end of the tunnel, you must realize that you are the light.”  Anonymous
 
This always makes me feel so empowered.  It reminds me that I am in charge of my own recovery.
 
Light shines out of darkness.  When I first came to OA, I was in a very dark place.  I thought my problem was that I couldn’t stop eating at certain times. Over time I realized there was a much bigger reason why the food called to me.

• Selfishness in so needing your approval to feel ok about who I was.
• A tired, worn belief that my opinion didn’t matter.
• An obsession with body size and weight that took up way too much space in my head.

 
It was hard for me to shine when I kept dumping darkness on myself.
 
When I saw people recovering in the rooms of OA, the first thing I noticed was that they looked “lighter.”
 
Could it be that when we have hope, coupled with a faith that works for us and an honest desire, with courage to talk with a sponsor, that our load is lightened and it shows up on our face? It seems to me as we rid ourselves of the darkness, the lightness of our heart can begin to glow.
 
You know, light only has one purpose…to shine!

May you be a shining example of recovery this year and may your glow help light the way for others seeking the peace found in O.A.
 
Nadine D.- Region One

 
 
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