How do I keep my abstinence when everyone around me is eating so many things I’m “not supposed” to eat?  What about those food pushers?  “I made this just for you.  You have to try a little bit.” 
 
The Twelve Step program of Overeaters Anonymous tells me that my compulsion will be removed if I work the Steps and have a spiritual awakening which is sufficient to change me so that I no longer crave foods which are not good for me.  I have experienced this removal of the compulsion.  And the last several holiday seasons I have had no compulsions and no temptations.  Of course, over the years I have trained my family, so they don’t expect me to eat those things and they don’t push them on me.  I am grateful.
 
However, the first few holiday seasons I was in Overeaters Anonymous I was not free of the compulsion.  And sometimes it was very hard to stay out of the food.  I have found several things that work for me to help me keep my abstinence.  
 
First, I try to remember that my abstinence and my OA program are the things that help me have sanity and peace in my life.  I remind myself that really spending time with the people I love is much more important than the temporary high I get from the food.  I discovered that when I tell people I am allergic to certain foods, they want to know more about that and try to help by offering solutions to those things.  They keep asking questions and trying to talk me into things I know don’t work for me to eat.  I finally decided that simply saying one thing over and over works as well as anything.  I say “No, thank you” and indicate that I am full.  I can just keep saying “no thank you” over and over. 
 
Sometimes I just find some little kids and play with them; I can go for a walk and invite others to go; I can call someone (from the bathroom works well).  Sometimes I just pray or help with the dishes.  Another great trick is to help by passing out plates of the dessert--no one notices that I didn’t eat any when they see me with a plate of it in my hands. 
 
I read something this week that made lots of sense to me.  Someone shared that she tells people that she doesn’t eat foods that cause her to feel bad physically.  And she has found no one urging her to eat foods which make her feel sick.  (Those aren’t exactly the words she used but that was the idea). 
 
I need to remember how important my abstinence and sanity are to me every day one day at a time. 
​
Happy Holidays to all,
Margie - Region 1

I was thinking about the actions I need to take in this program to stay “on the beam.”  For me, my continued recovery is all about taking the next right step.  Not the next 10 steps, not the whole path.  Not the Google map with the highlighted route, just the next step.

I’m so aware of the lies I can tell myself about which step to take.  These non-truths affect the decisions that I make.  They affect my next right move.

If this program is all about action, what am I doing?  I mean, there is an entire chapter in the Big Book that says “Into Action.”  Not “Into Thinking about it.”  Not “Resting on my laurels because I’m doing pretty good right now.”

There is magic in taking action.  To me, that is a code word for:

       Me Accepting God’s In Charge!

And yet, my thoughts will go to the place of, “I want to do what I’ve been doing, why do I have to keep doing more?”

Well, one thought I’m having is that I have been given this gift of recovery, and it says on page 132 of the Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous),”…we have been given the power to help others.”  Wow, what a super power that is!  I only get to have this power by continued work on the steps and taking the action as outlined in the Big Book.  This purpose, this amazing life that does not include binging and shame is a treasure that I want to share. Selfishly, I want to give it away so I can keep it.

Oh boy, I better get busy and take the next right step.  It’s so worth it!

Nadine D. - Region 1

Relax.     Take it easy.     Don’t struggle.

Those are words I am trying to remember throughout the day. It is a reminder that God’s in charge, not me.

But, but…I do struggle! I get stressed! I have SO much to do! There’s no end to my list of responsibilities! 

Awareness—Oh look, my shoulders are up around my ears again. I notice I have knots in my belly.  In those moments, I take a deep breath.

​Acceptance—I remember that I am only human. I can’t rise above my humanness.  I am not God. I am not qualified to be God. I look at my past and see how far I’ve come in recovery. I take a deep breath.

Action—I breathe in deeply and consciously feel my body. I cajole the tight muscles to relax. I take a minute and look out the window. I remind myself that God’s in charge. I may call an OA fellow or read literature.  I may listen to a podcast of an OA speaker or I may call into a phone meeting.  Sometimes I even take the dog on a walk and pick up garbage or dog poop in my neighborhood.  Anything to get my mind off myself. 

Breathe in, breathe out. Step Ten and Eleven in action. Thank you, God, and thank you, OA!

Leslie - Region 1

Over the last several weeks I've been thinking a lot about "Keep It Simple," as Dr. Bob reminded Bill W.:  "Remember, Bill, let's not louse this thing up. Let's keep it simple." (Dr. Bob and the Good Oldtimers, p. 343)
 
In so many of my service circles we lament about the shrinking of our fellowship and what it will take to grow it again.  It feels like a big job.  But I am reminded that all I have to do is simply carry the message to the best of my ability - that means showing up for meetings and doing what I can to add to the experience, strength and hope in the room.   Whenever possible, I'm trying to share about "what I was like, what happened, and what I'm like now."  
 
After all, why would anyone come back to OA unless they hear about what separates this program from the hundreds of other options?  We have food plans, but so does everyone else.  But, if I hear someone say "food had me by the throat; it was the most important thing in my life, but the 12 steps and my higher power have relieved the obsession," that's unique.
 
At one of the World Service Business Conference workshops titled "Attracting Young People," one presenter who came into the program at 17 and the other in his early 20's, shared about what attracted them to the fellowship and kept them coming back. A key takeaway for me was that it wasn't about sitting in the rooms with other young people, it was hearing about attractive recovery from anyone of any age. The younger set wants to hear from older fellows who also came into the program young.  Workshop attendees were encouraged to share a message with weight and depth when talking about recovery in meetings.  
 
When I get all wound up about how to "save OA" and increase membership, I need only remember to carry the message as I have been taught to the best of my ability.  That's "keeping it simple!"
 
Cindy C. - Region 1

​“I’m just not willing…Please help!”  

Oddly enough, that has become one of my favorite prayers.  What are the things I need that prayer for in my program?

Should I give up bread?  Maybe my portions at dinner should be smaller, (but it takes that much to satisfy me, and I just don’t want to eat less). 

I struggle, I wrestle with the thoughts.  In complete honesty I say to my Higher Power, God, “Please help me in my unwillingness. I don’t think I’m willing to go deeper with trusting you.”

So I pray.  I spend time with God and keep being honest about how I’m feeling.

Suddenly, the thought crosses my mind, “Maybe I should try measuring a few things.” Nothing drastic, my oatmeal for breakfast, my serving of peanut butter, my salad dressing.  A new level of honesty, a new, different feeling of peace around food, and all of a sudden, I’m not eating as much bread and it’s completely OK with me. Getting honest with my food helps me get honest in other areas of my life as I watch in amazement as God does for me what I could never do myself.

I like this new level of honesty with God.  I don’t have to be afraid to express how I feel.  I don’t think God is surprised by it.  So, I discard the old thinking that I’m doing something wrong when I express the thoughts of unwillingness dancing in my head.

I grab hold of the principle of honesty, and I do the next right thing.

Nadine - Region 1